My brother Aki is one of the most sensitive people I know. It is one of the qualities I love most about him. The other day when we video chatted via gmail with Mylo, he welled up with tears. I called him on it, but in hindsight I knew damn well why he was misty-eyed. Besides the fact that he hasn’t seen his nephew in a while, he is expecting a tyke of his own in weeks, maybe even days.
It’s almost impossible not to feel like an emotional basket case during the imminent arrival of your first child, the little person you do not yet know but who will change your life forever. I have no doubt that seeing Mylo triggered a happy place for my brother, a place he does not yet know but has spent the last nine + months dreaming about.
I am so excited to watch him become an incredible and doting dad. But I feel so many other things, too. His starting a family means less visits back East to see us. And because we’re on different coasts I don’t expect that I’ll get to know his daughter as well as I would like.
It feels like just yesterday when Aki and I were cruising in my mom’s BMW with the sunroof open, going over the Robert Moses Causeway Bridge. The sun beating down on our curly hair, the ocean’s breeze on our face, we were young, unattached and full of possibility. Now we live on different coasts, have started families of our own, and are on other ends of the spectrum career-wise.
My brother and his wife’s future is taking off. They have a baby on the way and their careers have been prosperous. I couldn’t be happier for them. I only have one sibling and yet sometimes it feels like the distance between us is growing.